I HATE MOVING

I guess there's not much point in thinking if I say something I'll jinx it, I'm already jinxed. My brain is completely shut down right about now. Not even sure why, it's the middle of the afternoon and I had plenty of sleep plus a nap this morning.

But the moving saga begins. I had made Mr. Mouse one more mousy pan of brownies last week so he'd be chocolate-ated right before the move, and we went and bought cleaning supplies. When we got back, I went and baking soda-d and vinegar-ed the drains (it makes a really cool reaction, and leaves them smelling fresh) well anyway, in the meantime, you put some water on to boil and that, when poured down the drain, completes the trifecta and gets all of the last dregs of baking soda out. Fast forward to Matt wrinkling up his nose and heading for the kitchen. The brownies, in all their foam plated glory, were catching on fire. For the first time EVER in having a stove, I turned on the wrong burner and torched the last of his brownies and left the kettle untouched. We turned on the fan and the fire alarm didnt go off, but we're lucky.

I hate moving.

Whining

I'd like to take this time to apologize for my incessant whining. It's unnecessary. Feels good, I'll admit. Hope you'll all still read me even though I'm being cranky.

The Last Time We Moved

August of 2004

UHaul that didn't want to idle. Means: you can't move it without jamming on the gas and if you stop, it dies. Good luck backing up to the house. Give up and leave it hanging a bit but think it will be okay.

Loading things: we did it one piece at a time, through a misting rain that made it just uncomfortable to move quickly when you weren't laden with boxes. The ramp got awful slick with rain and dirt from our shoes. Only 2 of us to move. I'm a weakling. Takes forever.

Tow Dolly: don't try and move a 77 Bronco with big tires with a Tow Dolly. Try one way and it doesnt work. Then Plan B: When you get it ramped up over the "ramp" it will fall down and catch the dolly in between the tires. Stuck. So you have to call 3 tow trucks, 2 of which laugh and say they can't help you, and one who sits and laughs and laughs while getting it hauled up onto there straight. Plan B Sucks.

Forgot to take my bc pill the night before and had to "start" and nothing for panty protection since it was boxed up elsewhere.

Washer and dryer along with other things loaded up to go to parents' house. Including full used-oil container. White washer and dryer. Covered with used motor oil due to container coming undone. Fell, sat and stared at it and laughed instead of crying. Got out Formula 409 and cleaned it up.

Got stuff moved into apartment. Lived there for 3 years, moving again. Sigh. Got any 409? And Plan B still sucks!

Little Meeces?

It didn't mean as much to me when my boss had her baby last week as when my girlfriends had theirs (so jealous!) but then I had to put up with her craziness & repeat over and over to myself every day "she's pregnant, it's the hormones" and ignore a lot of idiosyncrasies that would have probably caused me to look for another job. Do I want to be that crazy? Maybe, maybe not. But my friends (and boss, I guess) having babies reminded me: I'm a heck of a lot tougher than most people give me credit for. Also all the horrible things that they do it you at the hospital I had to deal with when my appendix was going bad in my gut, so that only leaves labor and delivery, and while I don't think it will be a piece of cake, I know if my friends could handle it, I could too, and let's face it, umm... once you're into it, you don't really have much choice. And I have always pictured myself with kids (someday) especially since Matthew and I met. He's so great with kids and I know he'll be a great dad, and he wants to be a daddy mouse awful bad. I don't know if he gets it like I do though. Connecting with my readers and the other blogs I read and hearing what they go through every day. The good and bad, the changes to your body. The changes to your overall life... After all, what happens to him? Umm. Yeah. Nothing.

I must say, he has gotten a lot better about helping me out, and that bodes well for him. He knows he would be lost without me, and that's a good feeling, to be needed and wanted, but I also want him to JUST DO IT. Take care of things without having to be reminded. Do it often, every day, several times a day. Granted, we're stuck in a tiny apartment with 2 windows and one door. Our kitchen is a hallway and our bathroom is barely big enough to turn around in. So that makes it like a triathlon to get the vacuum out and use it. What's the point? And no dishwasher and laundry down the outside balcony and down the stairs, juggling the heavy basket while you try to key the door open.. good grief! As for Mr. Mouse, he's been going to school and working, and since he graduated, his helpfulness went through the roof. When he sees me get frustrated, he says what can I do, or just does something that needs done. Sometimes he just gets out my hair, and that helps too.

I just can remember my mom gardening and cleaning the house all the time and laundry and so much without any help, and it drives me crazy. She was always so tired and that wasn't fair. And even when she complained she didnt get help from anyone but me. Why should I put myself through that? How can I prevent it? I know Mr. Mouse is not like my dad, but how can I be sure he'll help? Do I say let's have one and if you're good we'll try again? Do I make him split chores with me ahead of time and then give him more once I can't see my shoes anymore? Do I just trust he'll see that I can't carry heavy stuff anymore or that I'm falling asleep at 8 pm and the dinner dishes are still out, no one has clean underwear for the next day, etc? I know that together we make a great team, but I'm worried that work will come first like school had to come first, and that deadlines will mean I'm home alone taking care of the little meece day and night, no day care, no family around to give you a break, etc. I know I'm tough enough for all the labor and delivery, all that. But since the stone age women have had family around, people to help, and for all intents and purposes, I would be alone. Recognizing my history for depression on occassion, would I fall into PPD and not be able to get help? Would Matt "get it" or would he just be upset if I sat and cried with the baby? I know other people have gone through it and come out the other side, but it worries me. I know he reads this, but do we talk about that beforehand? Do I mention my worries specifically, or do I trust he'll know I need a break if I haven't moved all day? I'd be interested to hear what my readers think. Especially those with children already. I know there is a balance between insanity and joy in having kids. Which wins?

Closing Time Open All the Doors & Let You Out Into the World

Closing time, time for you to go out to the places you will be from...
Closing time, every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end...
---------------------------------
Another chapter in our little meece lives is being closed, and another opened.
For the first time we will really be on our own, more than a comfy hour's drive from family, definitely not doable for me alone. Moving into a strange city where I know no one but Mr. Mouse. I am a little nervous, but I think it will be worse saying goodbye to family. That is what we will have to do this weekend.

However, the new chapter should be exciting and challenging, and Mr. Mouse should be really happy. I have no idea what this means for me, a country mouse in a city. I think we will do this for about 3-5 years and then will move on to another job for Mr. Mouse. This starting out will give him the opportunity to get the experience he needs. Programmers are in high demand, especially with experience, and right now he has none. We are being treated well enough by the company, and once we're on our own I hope it means I'll grow a little more and not just make a nice hidey-nest in our apartment and never leave.

It also means there might be some sleepless nights ahead of us. I turn the big 2-8 next weekend and it's closer to 30 than am happy with. I intended to have school all done with and several years of experience before I started a family, but circumstances have prevented me from it. I guess I don't mind changing the plans, but I know how hard it's going to be to try and help kids with homework while I am doing my own. It was hard enough to hold down a job and take one class, let alone wrestle a bunch of baby meeces into compliance while doing both. I guess I don't really know what the future holds, but I know in some ways I've hit a dead end in this little maze. If I don't begin attempting to have kids, I won't have any because I'll be too old, and that worries me too. Everyone else I know had kids young. As it is, I have no energy and all I do is go to work and take care of the house. How will I ever do it all?!? Lots of changes coming my way. Read the next post for more little meece pondering.

CR, IA Bound?!?

Hi all,

Just wondered if you had any "calm down" advice for me. After an interview with another company on Friday, I think Mr. Mouse is going to accept a job in CR. The only problems I see with this are #1 we don't currently have 2 reliable long-distance vehicles and #2 CR is a big city and the thought of driving in it to get to a job interview (have to work in same area if only one car) with him at work in a brand new city during rush hour is beyond me. I hate driving, especially in more traffic than 2 lanes. I know, its sucky, but what I can I say, it "paranoys" me. I know, stupid quoted word, anyway, those are my big concerns. I am flat out scared of having to drive in that by myself. I get nervous in towns of 20,000 with turn lanes, how am I ever going to handle getting a job where I have to get to work on a freeway, and then, if not, how to get to doctor's appointments if we #1 share a vehicle and #2 if I have no idea about the city or how to drive around it! Ahhhh! This will be the deal, prolly, if we go there its time to mak-a-da-babies because I'm fast closing in on 30 and it scares me to pieces thinking about having kids over 35. Help me!

Oh a hunting we will go...

Hi readers,

Just wanted to check in and let you know that despite my long absences, I am still here and doing well. We are just now through with finals and that means interview time. We leave when I get off work and head to Cedar Rapids, where Mr. Mouse will interview hopefully for a REALLY good paying job (that he loves)...and visit a realtor... and visit my friend Alissa (and hubby Nate) for dinner, etc.

We are excited and feeling insane at the same time. It will be a great adventure if we choose to embark on it, and at the same time it's a little sad because we will be farther away from our families. Granted, they don't come and see us, we go visit them, so it won't be much different except we won't be able to go back for church every weekend and we won't be able to "see" the puppies grow up I guess, unless we visit a lot. Sure will be different not to have slobbery mouths licking at us 2 days a week. Guess that means we need our own dog if we move? Crazy!

And there there's land/house hunting and figuring out a new place and finding me a job!?! And everything that goes with that. Some of it sounds really fun, some of it not. One day I'll get around to telling you about the Last Time We Moved. Yuck!

And if not, I stay in the job that I'm in, umm Matthew goes to graduate school and we job hunt in 2 years or less. Clock is ticking, best get back to work, but wanted you all to have an update, since you keep yours up to date.

Btw, finals went well, I got an A, so hopefully that means an over all A, and Matthew said his went well, we shall see.